I'm cleaning my room right now and went through one of my drawers, and look what I found:
A crazy epic vest! My stepgrandparents gave it to me a few Xmases back because they knew I liked 'vintage clothing.' Ironically, it's not vintage at all (it's Yes London if you care to know).
Ostensibly, it's a simple jersey cotton, but a closer look reveals:
It's asymmetrical to the max and has about 80 different fabrics on there: gold plastic-y stuff, brown suede, black wool, lace, what looks like the back of a Velcro strip, velvet, and some itchy blue sparkly stuff around the collar (the main reason I don't wear this that often--the itching drives me nuts).
Not that I'm a snob or anything (LOL JK), but there's a fine line between the seamless blending of fabric and pattern a la Missoni:
And the "throw everything at the dress form and see what sticks" a la Guadalupe Vidal:from Project RunGay
This vest falls squarely into the latter category.
Closeups on the tickety-tack!
Five different fabrics/threads/patterns!
Random fabric paint! Clashing black/brown! Buttons that don't work!
Strange inside-out darts. Or are they pleats? I CAN'T TELL!
The piece de resistance: a giant motherfucking collage of lace, gold thread, pearls, beads, bows, velvet, wool, the kitchen sink, Angelina Jolie, and Master Chief. (The shiny is the pearls, in case you were too BLINDED BY THE EPIC TACKY).
It looks like Jackson Pollock in 3-D. So classy.